Six months ago today....(sorry no Secret today)

I can't believe that today marks the passing of Cody 6 months ago today. We believe that he actually passed on the day of his accident but legally he passed on the 20th when they disconnected him. Look at this picture of him, this was taken only days before he had his accident. He was a normal 13 year old. Life is not fair and I still don't understand why he had to go.
I miss my little Cody so terribly much. The pain is still strong and there is not a day that goes by that I don't think of him. Every morning when I wake up I say good morning to him and when I go to bed at night I say good night - but at night I can lie in my bed, alone and cry. I dont know when or even if the crying will ever stop. I just dont understand any of this. All I know is that I am not ready to go over in my mind the day of his accident. The wound in my heart is still too deep to think of it. It hurts terribly and I wonder if it will ever heal. My heart breaks when I see Lisa - her eyes are vacant most of the time and I know I will never ever have my old Lisa back. She doesnt understand it either. People say it was God's will, that doesnt help us right now. And I know that a lot of people have gone through the same thing, losing a child is the worst...but selfish as this may seem, I just dont want to hear about the other person because WE are going through it now and I cant think about those other people. That sounds so terribly horrible but it's the truth although I wonder how they managed to get through it...We are getting through it, we are living and sometimes we even seem truly happy. But there is always that emptiness that we feel, the pain in the heart, the hole that doesnt seem to want to get better. There are some days that I feel bad and I am not sure what it is, until of course I really think about it and those are the days when I know it's all about Cody, when I have seen Lisa or Greg or Amanda - I see their vacant looks and then I know why I am feeling so bad. I hate this. I really really hate this and some days just want to hide my head under the covers and never come out. BUT - reality is and reality sucks - we have to accept this and thats that!! AND I HATE THAT....

GRANDMA'S

Just a quick post to say that my friend Lise, Karen and myself are going to have a grandbaby play date. We all have brand new grandbaby girls; Lisa and Karen's g/babies are about a month older than Arianna. Anyhow we are all getting together with the babes and going for a walk with them and we have promised not to compare who has the cuter g/babe...I will post the pictures after we meet... (I can't wait)!!

Meet Ali

Hi all, I would like to introduce you all to Alexandra Nicole Eldeen Ince - and she loves to say her name even if it sounds a little different than what it is. She is my 4 year old grandaughter, and I have to say she is the most precocious little girl anyone ever could have met. Now I love her, and it's not because I have to love her because she is my grandaughter but I would love her anyhow. You can't help but not fall in love with her...but beware - she can be one tough little egg to crack. She can make even the biggest of giants quiver in their boots. She knows how to turn on the charm but also she knows how to make you feel like you are a teensy little speck on this earth. She will talk to you when SHE wants to talk to you and she will smile when SHE wants to smile. It's all on her terms...but it's one of her qualities that endears me to her. Just the other day I took her shopping (yes, I did) - clothes shopping to boot. We went to Mark's Work Warehouse and I was busy looking for some clothes to buy - I may have mentioned in a previous blog that I have lost a little weight (no I am not bragging)but I really needed some new clothes. Well after running after Ali all over the store trying to find her in her little hiding spots I finally grabbed her and said "STAY" and finally I got into a room to try some pants on. WELL that was a mistake. It was so crowded in that store and there was a lineup for the changing rooms at least a mile long and please, keep in mind that this is a ladies and MENS store...so anyhow there I am undressing and out of the mouth's of babe comes (and I know for sure that she had a MICROPHONE tucked under her dress) - NANNY WHY HAVE YOU GOT THOSE GREAT BIG BAGGY UNDERPANTS ON....sheesh - I could hear snickering going on outside the doors and in the stall next to me someone burst into laughter and says - man, I gotta sit down on for that one!!!! I didnt know whether I should just stay in the stall until the store closed or...anyhow I managed to sneak out - well I lied, I actually didn't sneak out because THEY ALL KNEW ...and as I went to bed that night I could still hear the snickering echoing in my ears!! Oh Yeah, I just love my Ali!!!

HAPPY 50th JIMMY

Happy 50th Birthday brother Jim. Wow you are making me feel old cuz I know I am older than you. How can you be 50 when I only feel 20....Love you

Congratulations Ryan and Laken

I just received an email from Carol (my sis in law) and the kids got awards for their Kumite and Kata (which is a type of Karate) Laken got a GOLD in Kumite and a bronze in KATA and a huge Sportsman trophy that she can keep for a year...Ryan got a SILVER in Kumite and a BRONZE in Kata. Laura was the table runner, she got the medals to give out and ran back and forth with the score sheets. Way to go Nordal Kids!! The Anderson's in Chilliwack are really proud of you all.

Amanda and Ali

Well hello everyone - sorry it's been so long. All work and no play makes Cathi a very dull girl (ha ha). Anyhow as promised I am posting some pictures of Amanda and Ali. I was at Lisa's house one evening and had a great night with the 3 of them. Amanda had just had her tattoo started (a memorial tattoo of Cody) and so I took pictures of that plus Ali had her own little (paste one) tattoo to show. Man I love those girls!!! They are all so awesome. Amanda is back in hairdressing school. Lisa just got a job with another driving school. She has lots of patience when it comes to that, scares the crap out of me but she thrives on "crap" I guess (again, ha ha)...Amanda had to bring in a male model to cut hair one day and she forgot. When she got to school they asked her where he was and she said she forgot, so they told her that she had to go across the street to the mall and find a male who would let her cut his hair. Then the lightbulb went off in her head and said "HEY I dont need to find someone, I have a PAPA...so she phoned her papa and he came in and she cut his hair and WOW she did an awesome job, especially since Willy has such difficult hair to cut!!! See ya'll later. Love ya's.